{"id":22271,"date":"2022-02-27T16:11:41","date_gmt":"2022-02-27T15:11:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/miracleproject.earth\/en\/geen-onderdeel-van-een-categorie\/hoofdstuk-1\/"},"modified":"2026-05-12T15:09:37","modified_gmt":"2026-05-12T14:09:37","slug":"chapter-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/miracleproject.earth\/en\/books\/money-is-never-about-money\/chapter-1\/","title":{"rendered":"Chapter One. One Person\u2019s Bread"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
May 2006<\/em><\/h5>\n\n\n\n
<\/div>\n\n\n\n

The end of my third bachelor\u2019s degree looms. It will be the first one I\u2019ll finish. For five years, I\u2019ve been hopping from course to course, getting mediocre grades and being a just-good-enough, uninspired boy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For what? <\/em>I now ask myself. And what now?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

I don\u2019t know.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Apply for a master\u2019s degree that supposedly ties in with my bachelor\u2019s?<\/em>
Okay, that question gives me a dead feeling in the chest.
Get a full-time job?<\/em>
Fantastic idea, but where exactly? And with what story? \u2018Yeah, so hi, hello, I don\u2019t know why I\u2019m here, I don\u2019t know what I\u2019m capable of, and I don\u2019t know what I want. But look, here\u2019s my degree!\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s an uncomfortable realisation, but really, it\u2019s not a realisation. This moment\u2019s been coming since before I started studying. The only difference is the location of that gaping hole: right in front of me instead of beyond the horizon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For a few weeks, anxiety and occasional bouts of fear mark my days, and then, suddenly, there\u2019s resolve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m not going to leave this path dissatisfied<\/em>. There must be a way to turn this around for the better.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s no pushing; the decision\u2019s just there. It\u2019s not too late to take ownership of my learning.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

On a sunny Spring day, I start scavenging for classes that fascinate me and seem fun. Before long, I have a list that enthuses me. The thing is, I\u2019m not \u2018qualified\u2019 for any of it. And the other thing is, I\u2019m not going to let that stop me. I contact the professors of every class on the list. Each responds with the same message: \u2018If your exam board approves, you\u2019re welcome to join.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fired up, I submit a request, to which the exam board promptly replies, \u2018Your request goes against these and those rules and can therefore not be approved.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yeah, figures. This always happens when I\u2014<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hey, wait a minute\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Is what they\u2019re saying true?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I find a university regulation book and quickly discover that \u2018these and those rules\u2019 don\u2019t exist. I submit a notice of objection, which the exam board promptly rejects, again basing itself on rules without foundation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m not through yet. I discover there\u2019s a Board for the Appeal of Exams<\/em>, a kind of university \u2018Supreme Court\u2019. I write a letter stating my case, which never makes it to a hearing. A week before the start of the new university year, almost four months after my first request to the exam board, I receive a short and simple letter. \u2018We see no reason to reject your request and wish you all the best in following the programme you have composed for yourself.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Thus begins what will become my most fun year in school ever. For the first time, learning feels like a privilege instead of a burden. For the first time, the grades I\u2019m getting\u2014the highest ever\u2014are a sign of enthusiasm instead of obedience or rage. As the year progresses, my sense of empowerment grows. I can go for something that feels alive, even when others say I can\u2019t.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Eighteen months later I graduate with honours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The world\u2019s my oyster.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If I want something, I can get it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let’s go.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n
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<\/div>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
12th April 2009<\/em><\/h5>\n\n\n\n
<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Six weeks ago we started. They had asked me\u2014me!\u2014to come and take the lead. I couldn\u2019t believe my luck.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I had just figured out what I wanted: to be part of a startup adventure, develop cool things, shake up the Internet, conquer the world. Suddenly, this adventure was handed to me on a plate. I said \u2018yes\u2019, of course, and I\u2019d sure as shit show them how one does that, take the lead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

The adventure is called Buzzplaces<\/em>. Buzzplaces <\/em>is destined to be a website that gives people a real, inside look at companies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Because these days,\u2019 Steven had told me, \u2018we can so easily get a sneak preview of everything we\u2019re curious about: holiday destinations, restaurants, houses for sale, films\u2026 you name it. Thanks to the Internet, everything\u2019s becoming more transparent.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Photos of holiday destinations, restaurants, houses and films were projected onto a screen. When the screen went black, I returned my gaze to the two men sitting opposite me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Everything\u2019s becoming more transparent,\u2019 Steven repeated, \u2018except for work and employers. Almost every job posting on every job site tells the same story, so as a job seeker, you really don\u2019t know what kind of company you\u2019re dealing with\u2014until you go in for an interview. But since you\u2019re only finding meaningless information on the Internet, there\u2019s a big chance you\u2019ll visit companies that don\u2019t suit you and miss the ones that do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018We think this is ridiculous. With all of today\u2019s technology, how can it be, for something that plays such a big role in our lives, that we\u2019re still groping in the dark?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

From the corner of my eye, I saw the screen light up again. I turned my head and saw blue letters on a white background.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Buzzplaces <\/em>is a working name,\u2019 Michel said. \u2018We don\u2019t yet know what the name\u2019s going to be. We do know that we\u2019re going to make a kind of Facebook<\/em> for companies and businesses, but different from Facebook<\/em>. And different from LinkedIn<\/em>, because we think LinkedIn<\/em> is boring. People should be able to see\u2014really see\u2014through photos, videos and honest reviews, what it\u2019s like to work somewhere. In this way, we hope to make it easier for people to find their dream job.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018And the question\u2019s not, Are we going to do this?\u2019 Steven added. \u2018We believe in this. And how we\u2019re going to do it? We have no idea yet, but there must be a business model we can build around this. Our developers are enthusiastic; you\u2019re the first one outside our company to hear about it. Because we want you to take the lead.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Okay, let\u2019s pause for a moment. Who are Steven and Michel?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I didn\u2019t know either, not really. Steven, I\u2019d met only once before; Michel, I\u2019d known for less than ten minutes. They, however, seemed to know who I was, because they had just asked me\u2014me!\u2014to come and be their leader! The charge of flattery coursed through my body, and I nearly bounced off my chair with enthusiasm. Everything I wanted was here, now, ready for the taking, ready to take off.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We agreed I\u2019d sleep on it, but I already knew my answer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

A month before this meeting, my cousin, after hearing me about my fresh startup dream, had connected me to Steven. We met in a former bank building that now serves as a startup space. I was immediately enchanted. Steven spoke like I\u2019d never heard people speak, he listened in a way that was new to me, and whenever my mouth stopped talking, he seemed to wait for words to come out of his.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He told me about his core idea. \u2018Put the right people together under the right conditions, and talent will naturally rise to its highest potential.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To put this idea into practice, he had started an entrepreneurial collective called Yaiks<\/em>. \u2018Yaiks<\/em>\u2019, because entrepreneurship is filled with scary excitement, even when all the conditions are right.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

We sat down in his office and he asked me about life beyond graduation. I told him that I\u2019d started working as a freelancer, using my spare time to figure out which commercial company would teach me the ropes, realising in the process that I didn\u2019t want to be learning ropes in a big commercial company.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Okay, so let\u2019s suppose everything\u2019s possible,\u2019 he said after another silence, \u2018what then is it that you do want?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014\u2018To be here.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The words were out before I knew it. I was stunned. Never had I said something like that. And how could I? What did I know about Yaiks<\/em>? I\u2019d been there less than an hour!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I didn\u2019t explain myself, and that, too, felt new. I simply felt a warm, logical sensation in my chest, and that was enough. I wanted to be here, period.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Steven showed me around the office and introduced me to his co-entrepreneurs. A little over two hours after we had shaken hands, we said goodbye with a hug. Again something new\u2014hugging a man\u2014and again, that warm, logical feeling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

We had agreed not to agree on anything, and a month later, Steven sent me an email to ask if we could meet again. For politeness\u2019 sake, I said \u2018yes\u2019. Someone had just offered me a job, and I was going to take it, so this second meeting with Steven would be the last, for now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Thanks for your honesty, Mundo,\u2019 Steven said as we sat down again. \u2018Well, maybe we can still convince you. Wanna take a walk with me?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My heart started pounding. Convince? <\/em>my mind asked. Man, sounds important!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Steven led me into a dark presentation room. In the middle stood an oval-shaped table. On it were a laptop and a buzzing beamer; seated at the table was someone whom I didn\u2019t recognise from my previous visit. He introduced himself as Michel, co-owner of MARS media<\/em>, one of the startups in the Yaiks <\/em>collective. Thirty days later, I sat down behind my new desk, chock-full of enthusiasm, let\u2019s go<\/em>, and yeehaa!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Today, we\u2019re six weeks down the line and I no longer know where to find any let\u2019s go <\/em>and yeehaa<\/em>. I\u2019m sitting at my desk, holding a large sheet of paper with notes from a brainstorming session I organised two days ago. The sheet\u2019s supposed to tell me something\u2014it was a brainstorming session, after all\u2014but all I see are letters and doodles, dancing and spinning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My hands are sweating, my belly\u2019s aching and I feel a wet mess coming out of my armpits. I just came back from a round trip to the toilet, having tried to take a shit, hoping that would solve my belly ache, but alas, of shit no sign. For days, there\u2019s been no shitting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yesterday evening, I felt panic rising; this morning, after a sleepless night full of pushing panic down, I went to yoga class and re-found my let\u2019s go<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes!<\/em> I thought. Let\u2019s get this show on the road again!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Filled with new courage and a newly found set of amazing ideas, I rushed to the office. Just before I arrived, there it was again: panic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let\u2019s go!<\/em>\u2014Panic\u2014let\u2019s go!<\/em>\u2014Panic\u2026 For weeks now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Two evenings ago, after the brainstorming session had ended and everyone but I had gone home, I called my dad. It was close to midnight, but he immediately picked up. I didn\u2019t know what to say and started crying. Half an hour later, he opened the door for me in his bathrobe. I felt burdened and grateful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dad made tea, and we sat down. I still didn\u2019t know what to say or where to start. He asked questions and I crafted answers, but none of my words felt real.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Mundo,\u2019 he said after a while, \u2018aren\u2019t you simply in need of a holiday?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014\u2018No, I’ve just been on holiday.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another robot answer. \u2018Man doesn\u2019t need a holiday when man has just had a holiday.\u2019 Dad stopped asking and I was done for the night.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Thanks, Dad, for letting me come over.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Exhausted, I cycled home, hauled myself up the stairs, and fell into bed. Tomorrow\u2019s another day<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yesterday was another one of those days.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Today looks to be another one of those days.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

I lay the brainstorming sheet on my desk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

OK, <\/em>I firmly tell myself, I\u2019m going to walk around<\/em> once more\u2014shortly, because I\u2019m here to be a leader, and then…<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I do a quick lap, come back to my desk and pep-talk myself into action.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Come on! Grab that brainstorming sheet and concentrate; I can do this!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

My belly\u2019s aching, I\u2019m sweating all over the place and I see letters and doodles, dancing and spinning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What the fuck <\/em>is<\/em> this?! This is what I wanted, isn\u2019t it?!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The noise in my head doesn\u2019t stop me from hearing shoes making their way across the office space. I look up and see Steven, with next to him, someone I don\u2019t know. As they pass me, Steven\u2019s eyes catch mine. A smile forms on his face and<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What? Is that a chuckle? Is Steven chuckling at me?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I feel my head turning bright red, which I really don\u2019t want, so I bow down and glance over the sheet again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I stare and see everything spinning, and I don\u2019t want it to do that, so on I go, urging myself, Come on, come on, come on, COME ON!!!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Suddenly, all is quiet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Let it go.\u2019<\/sub><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

What the\u2026?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Just let it go.\u2019<\/sub><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Wait, those words didn\u2019t come from outside.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I didn\u2019t say or think them.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yet\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Let it go, Mundo, you don\u2019t have to do this anymore.\u2019<\/sub><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

My hands let go of the sheet. I stand up and walk towards the kitchen\u2014or better said, something lifts me and walks me towards the kitchen. There, I see Steven talking to a colleague. I wait. Our colleague walks away and Steven looks at me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018Steven, can we sit outside for a minute?\u2019
\u2014\u2018Yes, of course.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I find an emergency exit, push open the door and step onto a large, raised terrace that overlooks the business park of which our building is a part. On the edge, there\u2019s an emergency staircase leading down. I approach it, put my feet on the first step and sit. Steven takes a seat next to me and stays quiet. I don\u2019t know where to start, and I don\u2019t need to. Looking out to the plethora of office buildings, I simply hear the words coming out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n
\"Steven